..::3.12.04::..
yesterday was a moral with a very basic story: be respectful of your elders. in the span of a half an hour i have never felt so much for two people i did not know at all. walking down the subway stairs an old man told me to take my time that the train had just left. he was still standing there because he had no where else to go. and no money to take him there. i sat down to an elderly black man that was sipping a bottle of cranberry juice. very quietly he told me that the last two were crowded. he continued, but i had to have him pause. the train on the other side was overpowering. he was harmless and captivating and told me about his arm. how it was pinned together. how he couldn't always ride the train when he wanted, on account of how he couldn't brace himself for a sudden stop. and how he even had to sit a certain way. and that when the trains were crowded, that threw something else into the pot. the next train came and he told me to have a blessed day. he was talking. not complaining. not old seeming. i told him that he should ask someone if he could sit. erik told me that a certain recent research project studied the effects of people asking people for a seat on the train. the people almost always gave up their seat. and as it turns out, it was more stressful on the person asking. the man said he would continue waiting, which after we talked about the holiday shopping rush, could have been indefinitely, that he didn't want to bother anyone. it was quite sad. two stops later a tiny old black lady, who i'm guessing had to be at least in her eighties, possibly nineties, got on the train. carrying two large aldi bags with other bags in them she was hunched over and adorable. well dressed for the weather, a small tan cap on. her nails were too long to be short, her skin thin and wrinkled. hanging softly around her face. she looked like a weak angel on a mission from god. she looked at the seats that are designated for the elderly and disabled. all occupied. she looked directly at a young black woman reading. i was standing. i felt sick. no one offered up their seat. two stops later someone got off. she sat down. two bags in front of her. on the floor. i'm sitting now as well. a few stops later a large woman pulling a small luggage bag comes up from behind me. she doesn't attempt to lift the bag while passing through. she rams the bag into the old lady's bag, and the lady that was reading, her bag too. the reading lady snarls and moves her bag. the old lady looks distraught. angry. two stops later she puts on her gloves. her face is soft now. i wanted to ask her if she wanted some help. i didnt' need to be anywhere. but i didn' tknow if she'd trust me. would i ? getting an early start on her departure she stood up before the train stopped and almost fell when it did. a man was also getting off. she asked if he could help her. i smiled at him. he said yes. then rolled his eyes. i wish i would have asked. what is this world coming to?
