..::24.03.09::..
just when i think i'm over it or past it. it sneaks up on me. i was able to talk about her the other night without getting choked up. without feeling vulnerable. so it came as a surprise that morning when still half asleep i thought excitedly that i might call her to tell her my news cause i thought she'd be so happy. so proud. i wasn't thinking "i have this ability because of you" it was more that i wanted to thank her and tell her how excited i was. i am. i felt stupid, but mainly i felt i'd been had by my early morning emotions--something about that hour. i learned that if you cry in the shower no one will know you are crying and it's hard to tell when you've stopped.
my hamsa surfaced just in time to make me think she knows. and that's ok.
